Families are spending so much time with each other. Being under one roof 24/7, especially during this stressful time can cause lots of fights among our family members. Let’s face it there are probably times we may be feeling irritated and grumpy. This is true especially if you have children! “It’s her fault” or “He hit me first” are all things we are familiar with. Siblings tend to fight a lot on a normal day. With the added tension of the pandemic and the struggle of sharing a living space for a long time, there is no doubt about it they will end up fighting even more.
This might get on parents’ nerves and force them to react harshly. Instead of cooling the situation down, this might just add to the tension in our households. Here are a few ways that can help you manage your children if they are fighting or irritated.
Be emotionally stable yourself
We know that children do tend to mirror their parent’s behaviour. Therefore, many times if parents are arguing, children might too. The tension in the household might be coming from you and you might not even know it. Which is why it is important to think about how you feel as well. This means checking how you’re feeling both physically and emotionally. To keep your children from harbouring any negative feelings, make sure that you are not emitting negative vibes, caused by anxiety, yourself.
Check with your child
The most likely answer to your child being irritated and angry is that they are stressed. Children do not have the same inner resources to handle stress as we do. It is important that you have a conversation with them as they might be reluctant to do so. They might be scared of the way you would react to their feelings. Children often anticipate that their parents will react harshly in situations like these. It is your responsibility to build an environment where your children can talk about how they feel. Be honest about the seriousness of the pandemic but also give them a sense of hope and calm.
How to deal with a meltdown!
Even if your children do fight every now and then, it is important that they make up and not leave the tension hanging in the air. Here is how you, as parents, can help them reconcile.
Take time out – You need to take time out of your routine, even if you are working from home, to help your children when they need you. Sometimes, having the undivided attention of a parent helps children cope with their own stress. You can take this time to understand why your children are fighting and find a solution.
Use “I” statements – Ensure that your children reconcile properly if they have a fight. Make them use statements like “I did not like you taking this out of my bedroom” rather than “You did so and so”. This will teach them a healthier way to resolve conflict.
Stay focused on now – In times like these, it is important for everyone to have patience. Make sure that your children do not fight over something that happened a few days or weeks ago. It creates unnecessary feelings of negativity which is detrimental to their emotional health, especially during trying times, and especially in this current situation.
Lifestart Support
We fully understand there may be times when things seem a little overwhelming during these stressful times. We would like to take this opportunity to let you know if you need advice on general concerns on your young child’s development or behaviour you can PM us through our FB page and a family support worker will call you back. Please note this service is during normal working hours 9 am – 5 pm Monday to Friday. Link to our Facebook page.